Dark rom-com chaos, a serial killer retreat and a pineapple scene I will never unsee
Some books are comfort reads. Some books make you question your taste in fictional men. And then there is Sinners Retreat by Lauren Biel, which walked in carrying a pineapple, absolutely no apology and a warning label I should have taken more seriously.
I read this as a palate cleanser after the Legacy of Gods series by Rina Kent.
Some people use small-town romance for that.
I, apparently, reached for a dark rom-com about serial killers on vacation.
Growth? Unclear. But here we are.
What is Sinners Retreat about?
Sinners Retreat is the first book in Lauren Biel’s Slaycation series. It is a dark romantic comedy about what happens when a revenge mission and a yearly serial killer retreat end up on the same flight.
Kindra is tough, plus-sized and at the Sinners Retreat with one goal: find the Abattoir Adonis, the serial killer who murdered her brother, and deal with him. She is not there for a tropical holiday. She is there for revenge.
Ezra is nerdy, glasses-wearing and also at the retreat. He is, unfortunately, the man Kindra is hunting.
He figures this out. She does not.
What follows is a forced proximity romance between a woman on a mission and a man who is rapidly falling for her while trying to keep his identity secret. It is black cat x cinnamon roll, but the cinnamon roll is a serial killer. It should not work as a romance premise. And yet.
It is dark, funny, spicy and not a book you want to be explaining to someone who still thinks reading is a peaceful hobby.
Why I picked it up
I had already read Lauren Biel before this, so I knew we were not entering gentle romance territory.
I had read Don’t Stop, which made me stop and sit with what I had just experienced. Then I read her Christmas novella Frisky the Snowman, which was ridiculous in the best possible way.
Going into Sinners Retreat, I knew Lauren Biel could go dark, funny, completely unhinged or all three depending on the mood. This one felt like the funny lane. Not soft. Not normal. But definitely funny.
And when an author has books with banned status, Sinners Retreat is a prime example of: books I do not want my family to know I liked. It is not the most extreme Lauren Biel book. But it absolutely belongs in the “I cannot explain this at family afternoon tea” extended universe.
First impression
I knew very early what my rating was going to be.
A couple of chapters in, there is an incident involving an item in Kindra’s carry-on bag, the overhead compartment, a priest seated next to her and some unfortunately timed digestive distress. The timing of it all is very Lauren Biel. Peak dark rom-com chaos. It set the tone immediately and told me exactly what kind of book this was going to be.
I expected this to be funny. I expected it to be spicy. I expected it to be wrong in the most entertaining way.
What I did not fully expect was the pineapple scene.
I knew the book involved a pineapple.
I did not even come close to guessing what that would mean.
There was also a pina colada incident. Fruit and tropical beverages have both been placed on watch after this book. This is Lauren Biel. There is always another level.
The vibe
This is Lauren Biel’s “DIET Lauren Biel” lane, which she has described herself — and to be very clear, that still does not mean normal, soft or safe for family discussion. It just means the humour is the dominant register rather than pure darkness.
The whole thing has “I cannot believe I am laughing at this” energy.
The banter carries a lot of the book. The premise is genuinely ridiculous, and Lauren Biel leans into that fully. Kindra and Ezra are chaos in completely different styles, and somehow that makes the romance work. The setting, a remote island retreat specifically designed for serial killers, sounds like it should be horror-adjacent. Instead it is funny, chaotic and weirdly romantic.
This is not the book for people who take things too seriously.
It is very much for people who enjoy laughing at themselves for enjoying it.
The romance
Kindra and Ezra should not work as a couple on paper.
She is there to find and eliminate him. He knows this. She does not know he knows this. He is falling for her anyway, which is objectively a terrible situation to be in and somehow makes for a very compelling romance.
The dynamic is black cat x cinnamon roll — Kindra brings the guarded, sharp, “I am on a mission and you are a complication” energy, and Ezra brings the nerdy, supportive, wildly enthusiastic energy of someone who has finally found a person who understands his very specific interests. Right up until the moment he realises those interests are why she is here.
The romance is funny, tense and sweet in a context where sweet should not exist. It has forced proximity, secret identity tension and a man who is doomed from the moment he starts caring.
He falls first. He falls hard. It is, unfortunately, adorable.
Fictional man assessment
This is Ezra’s section and I have to be careful about it.
Ezra is nerdy. He wears glasses. He refuses to take them off in the bedroom (this comes up — it is a detail Lauren Biel made a whole thing of, and she was right to). He is a serial killer who is somehow cinnamon roll coded. He is enthusiastic, supportive, deeply weird and not a normal romantic prospect in any universe.
Would I survive dating Ezra in real life? Absolutely not. He is a serial killer. This is not a fictional man to recommend for the real world.
In the safe, trigger-warnings-checked, Lauren Biel dark rom-com container? I get it. He works. He is sweet, he is nerdy, he is completely obsessed with Kindra from the moment he meets her, and somehow Lauren Biel made all of that feel like a feature rather than the obvious problem it should be.
This is a “please keep him inside the Kindle where he belongs” situation.
I love him.
That is the problem.
Verdict: Romance alive. Possibly holding a weapon. But alive.
Main character vibes
I loved Kindra.
She is tough, plus-sized, determined and walking into the Sinners Retreat with one goal and no time for distractions. Getting her centre stage and getting her full story was exactly what this book needed. She is not soft. She is not here to be rescued. She is here for revenge, and she is not apologising for any of it.
What makes her work is that she can carry the chaos. With a book this ridiculous, you need a main character who can match the energy, participate in the banter and not make the whole thing feel too heavy. Kindra absolutely matches it.
I connected more with the tone of the book than with deep emotional investment in her arc, but that felt right for this one. Sinners Retreat is not trying to devastate you. It is trying to entertain you in increasingly unhinged ways. Kindra holds that up brilliantly.
She brought the black cat energy. Ezra brought the chaos. Together, they made a completely ridiculous premise weirdly romantic.
Sinners Retreat spicy chapters: how spicy is it and where?
Sinners Retreat is a 3 out of 5 on spice, but the scenes that have landed in my permanent memory are not there because of heat alone — they are there because of the humour.
Is it spicy, and how much?
Yes. Romance.io rates this explicit and plentiful, and that tracks. Open door, adult content, specific kink territory and some genuinely surprising moments.
That said, Cassie’s spice rating is 3 out of 5 — because with Lauren Biel, the humour is doing as much work as the heat. The pineapple scene is the one everyone talks about. Not because it is the most explicit thing you will ever read, but because of what it is and how Lauren Biel handles it. The plane scene in the first few chapters sets the comedic tone early and signals that spice in this book is not going to be your standard romance heat.
This is not safe-for-the-cafe-table spice. But it is also not “stare at the wall and question your life choices for three days” spice. It is “why am I reading this, why am I laughing, and why is there fruit involved?” spice.
Which chapters are the spicy ones?
The spicy chapters in Sinners Retreat are: 7, 9, 13, 18, 20, 23, 25, 32 and 33.
- Chapter 7 — early heat, tone is set
- Chapter 9 — building
- Chapter 13 — building further
- Chapter 18 🛁 — the bath scene
- Chapter 20 🍹 — the pina colada incident (I cannot explain this in a public setting and I will not try)
- Chapter 23 🍍 — THE pineapple scene (you have heard about this. the reputation is earned.)
- Chapter 25 — post-pineapple chaos continues
- Chapter 32 — back half heat
- Chapter 33 — closing it out
The pineapple scene in chapter 23 is the one that lives in readers’ minds permanently. Chapter 18 is the bath scene that readers mention almost as often. And chapter 20 has a pina colada situation I am choosing to describe only as: memorable.
Favourite moment
The plane scene was the moment I knew exactly what kind of book this was going to be.
The overhead compartment. The priest seated next to Kindra. The digestive distress. The timing of it all. It is peak Lauren Biel — ridiculous, wrong, funny and completely committed to the bit. That scene set the tone so clearly and so quickly that I knew my rating almost immediately.
The pineapple scene is obviously the headline moment. It is the thing people reference when they recommend this book, the scene that causes group chat chaos and the reason tropical fruit is now a category of thing I discuss with a certain expression on my face.
I will not be describing it in detail. You either know, or you need to read it and message me immediately after.
Most unhinged moment
The pineapple. Obviously.
The real unhinged thing is not just that the scene exists. It is that it exists, it works with the tone of the book, Lauren Biel made it funny instead of just strange, and I am sitting here writing about it in a book review as if that is a normal thing I do on a Tuesday.
Well. That certainly happened.
If this book had a scent
This book smells like a tropical drink left unattended at a very questionable resort.
Pineapple and coconut cream leading, with dark cherry and spiced rum underneath. Black vanilla and smoked amber for the night-time chaos energy. Something sweet on the surface with a very specific warning label attached.
Fruity. Spicy. Darkly funny. Absolutely not as innocent as it looks.
If this book was a drink
A spicy pineapple margarita.
Bright, tropical, a little dangerous and impossible to separate from the events of this book. Also a suspicious pina colada — something fruity left alone with bad intentions and a warning label.
If this book was a snack
Grilled pineapple with brown sugar and chilli.
Sweet, spicy and not something I can view like a normal person anymore.
Alternatively: dark chocolate-dipped pineapple. Pretty on the outside. Questionable associations on the inside.
If you bring pineapple to book club after reading this, you owe your group chat an explanation.
Read this book if
- You already like Lauren Biel or dark rom-coms
- You liked Butcher & Blackbird and want something a step more unhinged
- You love black cat x cinnamon roll dynamics
- You want a plus-sized FMC who is tough, vengeful and not here to be rescued
- You want a nerdy MMC who is sweet, supportive and absolutely not safe in real life
- You enjoy secret identity tension and forced proximity on a remote island
- You like books that make you laugh while you are wondering whether you should be laughing
- You are comfortable checking trigger warnings first
- You understand that fictional red flags stay fictional
Avoid this book if
- You prefer soft, cosy or sweet romance
- You do not enjoy dark humour or shock comedy
- You need your spice to be gentle and emotionally tidy
- You dislike content involving violence, serial killer themes or specific kink content
- You are not in the mood to check trigger warnings before starting
- You want fruit to remain an uncomplicated topic
- You are planning to explain your reading choices to people who expect normal answers
Content warnings
Sinners Retreat carries real content warnings. Lauren Biel includes the full list on her website and I would strongly encourage checking it before starting.
Confirmed by reader sources: death and grief, graphic violence, fatphobia, torture of side characters, past sexual abuse, adult content including bondage and BDSM elements.
This is the funny Lauren Biel lane, but “funny” does not mean “safe for everyone.” Check your comfort level. Read responsibly. And monitor your feelings about pineapple.
Quick answers
What order do you read the Slaycation series in?
The Slaycation series by Lauren Biel follows a different couple in each book. The reading order is: Sinners Retreat (Book 1), Slay Ride (Book 2), Ship Happens (Book 3), Slaughter Park (Book 4). Each book works as a standalone, but the characters from previous books make cameos throughout the series, so reading in order gives you the full experience and makes those appearances land properly.
Can you read Sinners Retreat as a standalone?
Yes. Sinners Retreat is a complete story with its own couple and its own resolution. You do not need to have read anything else first. That said, Lauren Biel herself describes it as “DIET Lauren Biel,” and if you enjoy this one, the rest of the series follows the same dark rom-com chaos energy with different retreat settings.
Is there an age rating for Sinners Retreat?
No official age rating, but this is very much adult content. The book is rated explicit and plentiful for steam level and carries a range of content warnings including dark themes, graphic violence and mature spice content. This is not appropriate for younger readers and is not a “light spicy romance” — it is a proper dark rom-com with adult content throughout.
What should I read next if I loved Sinners Retreat?
If you loved the dark rom-com energy, Lauren Biel’s Slay Ride (Slaycation #2) is the obvious next read. If you want to explore the dark rom-com lane more broadly, Butcher & Blackbird by Brynne Weaver is a good comparison. If you want more of Lauren Biel specifically, her backlist ranges from “funny chaos” to significantly darker territory — I would suggest reading her content warnings before diving into her non-Slaycation books.
EmberSas ratings
Romance: ⭐⭐⭐⭐ / 5 — Kindra and Ezra should not be this cute. And yet.
Spice: 🌶️🌶️🌶️ / 5 — Spicy, but the humour is what made it memorable.
Tension: 🔥🔥🔥🔥 / 5 — Secret identity, revenge mission, remote island, two serial killers catching feelings.
Book Boyfriend (Ezra): ⭐⭐⭐⭐ / 5 — Sweet, nerdy, supportive and absolutely not safe in real life. Please keep him in the Kindle.
Emotional Damage: 🍍🍍🍍 / 5 — Not heartbreak damage. Fruit-related inconvenience.
Obsession Level: ⭐⭐⭐⭐½ / 5 — Moved straight on to Slay Ride. The series did its job.
Dark Rom-Com Chaos: 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤 / 5 — Lauren Biel understood the assignment.
Pineapple Damage: 🍍🍍🍍🍍 / 5 — Not permanent. But definitely enough that the fruit bowl is suspicious.
Would I Explain This To My Family: 🚫🚫🚫🚫🚫 / 5 — Absolutely not.
Review Snapshot
Book: Sinners Retreat: A Dark Rom-Com Author: Lauren Biel Series: The Slaycation Series, Book 1 Overall rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐½ / 5 Spice rating: 🌶️🌶️🌶️ / 5 Emotional damage: 🍍🍍🍍 / 5 (fruit-related, not heartbreak) Obsession level: ⭐⭐⭐⭐½ / 5
Final verdict
Sinners Retreat is pure Lauren Biel dark rom-com chaos. It is funny, spicy, ridiculous, wrong in several places and exactly the kind of book that makes you sit there thinking: “Well. I cannot unread that.”
That is the point.
This was a 4.5-star read. It was not emotionally devastating and it did not leave me with a book hangover, but it absolutely made me laugh, question the safety of tropical fruit and immediately pick up the next book in the series.
Kindra and Ezra were the highlight. Kindra is tough, vengeful, plus-sized and not here to be rescued. Ezra is nerdy, sweet, glasses-wearing, murdery and somehow cinnamon roll coded. Their dynamic should not be adorable. It is.
The pineapple scene is obviously the headline moment. The plane scene deserves recognition for announcing very early that this book had no intention of behaving.
Would I recommend this to everyone? Absolutely not. To the right kind of dark romance reader who likes their books funny, spicy, unhinged and deeply inappropriate in the most entertaining way? Yes. Check your warnings. Check your comfort level. Then prepare to never casually trust pineapple or pina coladas again.
“Okay, so I need you to understand that when I say this is pure Lauren Biel dark rom-com, I mean it in the most emotionally questionable way possible. Kindra is at a killer retreat to avenge her brother. Ezra is her nerdy little cinnamon roll seatmate. Except he is also a serial killer. And also the man she came to kill. Romance. This book was funny, spicy, unhinged and absolutely not something I will be explaining to normal people. There is a pineapple scene. There is also a pina colada incident. No, I will not be elaborating in a public setting. Was I entertained? Unfortunately, yes. Did I laugh? Also yes. Do I love Kindra and Ezra? I do. Should I? That feels like a separate question. Check your trigger warnings, check your comfort level, and then please read this so I am not alone with this knowledge.”
